10 Things You Should Never, Ever Say To Your Child
Being a parent is one of the most rewarding, but also challenging journeys in life. As a parent, you want to provide your child with as much love and support as possible. You also want them to have all the tools they need to succeed on their own. But naturally, there are times when you feel like you’re losing control of your little teaching assistant.
Parents often say disturbing things to their children. And while they can be intentional, a lot of these phrases can directly make your kid think. Here are 10 things parents shouldn’t say to their kids—ever!
1. Good Job!
This is the most common phrase. The majority of parents use it all the time, and it can be harmful to their children more than you think. It means “you did something I like” but it doesn’t give any indication as to what they did well. Children will become confused and unhappy when they don’t know what they did to earn the praise. It’s better to be specific and say, “I like how you helped your brother clean up the toys.”
2. You Can Never Do Anything Right!
The most devastating words a child will ever hear from their parents. It prevents them from growing up to be confident, successful individuals.
As parents we all want our kids to succeed, but sometimes we put too much pressure on them, making them feel like they are not good enough or they might fail.
The best thing you can do for your children is to build their self-esteem by telling them how great they are and what an amazing job they did doing whatever task it was. You will be amazed at how much better they will do in school, sports, and other activities when they have a strong sense of self-esteem.
Don't you think that your child is an angel, who doesn't do mistakes? In fact, your child is just a little human and has many flaws like you.
3. Can’t Say NO To Them!
There are instances when a parent cannot say ‘NO’ to a child for fear of damaging the child’s confidence. This can be done by going with the flow and saying ‘YES’ to the child without thinking of the consequences.
This may seem easy, but it can have disastrous effects on your child’s future. It is important that you develop a sense of discipline and control in your child at an early age.
4. You Should Be Ashamed Of Yourself!
Children are the most valuable property that any parent has. Children are the future, and they deserve all of our love, care and attention. Unfortunately, as with everything else in life, there is always a "but".
Almost all parents say some things to their children which they really should not have said. And, when we look back at it later, we feel terrible about it.
5. You Will Never Get Anywhere In Life If You Don't Study Hard!
When your child is struggling to get good grades in school, telling him that if he doesn't study hard, he'll never succeed, is wrong.
In the modern world many parents are obsessed with success and achievement. They want their children to be the best at whatever they choose to do. And you know what? They’re right. You can’t get anywhere in life if you don’t put in the work.
But success doesn’t come from hard work alone: it requires passion, patience, dedication, and a lot of luck.
6. You Are A Bad Boy/Girl!
Never feed negative thoughts to your child, it kills their identity. Children are innocent and believe in kindness. Tell them to be nice, happy, and positive always. Explain to them that certain words or actions are bad and can hurt or harm someone.
In fact, give them a positive comment like "You are the coolest/cutest/brightest kid in the world". Chances are they will never want to disappoint you again.
Teach them what is right and what is wrong, and to value the good over the bad.
7. I Wish You Had Never Been Born!
This is terrible if you are saying this to your child then it is a sign that you are a terrible parent. Children need love, care, affection, and attention. They need support and encouragement.
Parenting is the most challenging job in the world. However, it is equally important to remember that children are not our puppets. We can’t control them, and we can’t force them to do whatever we want them to do. All we can do is guide them, teach them, and make them understand what is right and what is wrong.
8. You Are Just Like Your Father/Mother!
Children are often compared to their parents in a positive way, but this is the worst thing you can tell them.
When you tell your child that they are exactly like their parent(s), you are not encouraging them to be unique. You are encouraging them to be a replica of someone else. And that is not an encouragement, it is an insult.
If you allow your child to be who they really are - without forcing them down a certain path -- you will help them learn about themselves and become better human beings.
9. What’s Wrong With You?
Dear parents, teachers, and other people working with children. Children are not born as blank slates that you can write whatever you want on them. They have their own personalities and therefore have different needs. In order to help your child, become a successful adult, it is important to understand these needs and provide the right kind of education.
10. I Can't Believe You Did That!
Children are able to pick up on hidden emotions and they don’t understand why you are upset with them or what it is that they have done wrong. This article will teach you how to improve your relationship with your child by giving them the ability to trust you, build their confidence and show you that they can rely on you.
Your child will pick up words or phrases that you use often and repeat them back to you. Bad words need to be removed from your vocabulary as much as possible.
You want the child to understand their potential to encourage them and shape their future. Every child learns at a different pace and develops at a different rate.
The best way to raise a child is to have a good relationship with him/her. It does not mean that you have to agree on every issue or that you have to be buddy-buddy with your kids all the time but being open and honest about your feelings and respecting your child’s feelings is the best way to raise a happy, healthy child.
Be a good role model. Children learn by example. If you want them to be respectful, you have to be respectful of others.
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