Do You Put A Lot Of Pressure On Kids?
Do You Put A Lot Of Pressure On Kids? A 'Good Parent' Will Never Do That.
Children who are more likely to be pressured by their parents to succeed are more likely to suffer from anxiety and depression. In a competitive world, it is often easy to blame the children's teachers or other external influences when they are not performing at an exceptional level. The constant stress of performance leads to children feeling that they are never good enough. This causes irretrievable damage to the mentality of the child.
If you find that you are putting too much pressure on your child, ask yourself:
Do I ask them a lot of questions?
Do I point to flaws instead of achievements?
Do I always overreact?
Does my statement make them uncomfortable?
Do I stop them to do any work?
Have I ever pushed my child so hard that I regret it now?
Parents who place a mountain of responsibility on their children increase the pressure that can backfire and have a negative impact on them in different ways. Negative effects can include children having nightmares, pulling hairs, turning to drugs, and even looking for below-average friends. Due to constant pressure on the child to succeed, your child will feel less motivated and more at risk.
Encouraging children acts as a lifelong positive motivation and helps to reduce unnecessary parental pressure. There are things that you can do as a parent to help children without putting too much pressure on them:
Parents Don't Criticize.
Parents today have the myth that high praise is the best way to help children develop a healthy level of self-esteem. When parents criticize their children, the child starts to form negative beliefs and doubts about their abilities.
It is important that parents praise children more for their efforts than for their successes. If you want your children to be happier than just giving praise, give them the chance to feel good about themselves.
Parents Should Not Micro-Manage.
One-way parents can unintentionally do is micromanage their child's activity to interrupt and direct their play. It makes a difference whether you do something right or let your child try it in their own way. Like if your child climbs a table or a chair and you tell them not to do it, you actually prevent them from exploring and enhancing their abilities.
A good example of parental help is when the child is struggling, and you help them. No matter if it’s a homework or any live challenge. Housework is also a time when children learn to set of tasks and monitor themselves. It is not a good idea to make a habit of answering questions on your child’s behalf.
One parent can involve the child in dozens of activities and arrange his or her free time in such a way that it is always productive.
Parents Make Their Arguments In Private.
It is normal for parents to argue, however the manner in which these conflicts influence children varies significantly. Parents who criticize or underestimate a child's feelings weaken their feelings and rules and increase their risk of mental illness. Anxious parents are more likely to give threatening and avoidable information to their children, which increases the risk of anxiety disorders.
Children notice arguments quickly even when parents think they don't. Boys and girls may react differently, girls tend to think emotionally, and boys have the ability to notice behavior problems. When it comes to pushing them into extra-curricular activities, you should consider your child's strengths and interests. The same gender-based approach can sometimes increase stress in children.
Parents Should Not Compare.
Comparing your child to others is likely to give them a negative image of themselves and others. You do not have to worry about how much other children are doing better. Parenting is not competition and you can prepare your child to make a positive difference in their life by giving them confidence and motivation to learn.
When you compare your child to others, teach them to look outward for their values. Show them that they can classify themselves as better or worse than others, instead of putting themselves against others.
As children reach different stages of development, their evolving needs can influence their relationship with each other and thus their interaction. Motivating children by comparing them to other children can help them to do good and become confident and successful individuals.
Although it is human nature to compare, and parents may have the best interest in doing so, they can do more harm than good if they expect two individuals to behave the same way and do the same.
Do Not Inspire To Fulfill Your Own Dreams.
Parents want their children to actually fulfill their unfulfilled ambitions. Knowing this, they make their children fall into the trap of dreams, which they themselves cannot realize. Not surprisingly, they, along with family members, are most interested in helping their children fulfill their dreams by being "part of their dreams".
So, dear parents, would you take away your child's freedom to force your dreams on him and kill his individualism? Remember that it does not teach your children how to follow their dreams but moves them to fulfill your dreams faster. Help your children set and achieve their goals.
Every parent should encourage their child to dream big and set goals for every small step along the way. Make sure they have a leader who encourages them in the right direction and a great source of inspiration.
If you think your child feels under too much pressure, it is important to take a step back. Giving them space to see and hear will encourage them and they will feel that they have not disappointed you. To inspire your child, they need to feel that they are in control of their lives.
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